Friday, May 27, 2011

Mission: Eat Right, Get Tight - Entry #1

MIND OVER MATTER

I'm at the beginning of my weight loss journey.  The very beginning.  Starting all over again.  Anticipating the hard work to come.  The same hard work that I've been through before and it's daunting.  My motivation isn't quite there yet, but I know to myself if I don't get my mind in the right place, I'll never get anywhere.

I've decided not to take this journey to YouTube as initially planned.  Don't know if I'll change my mind, but I feel like it's way too personal of an issue that I don't really want to put out there in that regard.  As much as I joke about it and what not, my weight is something I wish I didn't have to struggle with.  I wish it could be one less thing to worry about.

Using the questions in Dr. Ian K. Smith's book, The 4-Day Diet, I'm attempting to get a Sense of Where I Am, before I proceed:
  • Why are you currently over weight?
    I consume too much fast food.  I don't watch what I eat, nor how much I eat and I don't exercise.
  • Why have previous weight loss efforts failed?
     I didn't follow up with the previous lifestyle change when I moved to a new environment (Trinidad).
  • How dose your weight loss influence your self-esteem/self-image?
     I feel stink.  Unpretty.  Lazy.  Fat.  Unappealing.  Disgusted.  Is low self-esteem cliche enough?
  • What are your strengths related to sticking to a weight-loss program?
     I know what needs to be done, because I've done it before.
  • What are your weaknesses related to sticking to a weight-loss program?
     Actually doing what needs to be done.  Finding the motivation and not giving up.
  • Without weighting yourself or looking at a BMI chart, how many LBS do you think you're away from your target weight?
     30 lbs
  • What is your current BMI?
     26
  • What does the chart say is healthy for your height?
    18.5-24.9, which is 105lbs to 134lbs. I'm 17lbs away from being healthy and 30lbs away from my ideal weight.
  • What are your bad habits when it comes to exercising/eating right?
     Lack of will power and self-pity
  • What are your good habits when it comes to exercising/eating right?
     I can do whatever I put my mind to do.  I'm stubborn like that.
  • When was the last time you were at a weight you were happy with?
     Summer 2009
at this time, i needed a belt to keep these jeans on.
they were so big that they started gathering at the waist.
now, these jeans can't even go past my ass!

Summer 2009:  How did I get from there to here?

What foods did you eat then that you no longer eat?
THEN // home cooked meals, whole wheat, whole grains, fruits and veggies
NOW // everything, including the kitchen sink.

What foods did/do you eat in abundance?
THEN // home cooked 
NOW // I'm addicted to fast food.

Three physical activities you enjoy.
THEN // yoga, belly dancing, elliptical machine
NOW // yoga, belly dancing, zumba

Three hobbies you enjoy.
THEN // exercising, reading, cooking
NOW // make-up, writing, photography, reading, cooking

People, places, or things that stress you out.
THEN // stupid people (strangers), work, finances
NOW // finances, school, work, my future, parents, occasionally Dale

Where do you get most of your support?
THEN // parents ($$), myself
NOW // parents ($$), Dale, occasionally myself

How do you regard your physical appearance? (No interest, care a little, important, very important)?
THEN // very important
NOW // very important

How important is your health? (I don't care, some importance, important, very important)?
THEN // very important
NOW // important

Level of motivation. (None, some, good, very high, excellent).
THEN // very high
NOW // some-good

Assessing My Body Image: Villanova Body Image Self Quiz
I can easily name my favorite body part (other than my hair or eyes).
False

I can look at myself in the mirror and wee an attractive person looking back.
False

I am not preoccupied with when I can and cannot eat.
True

I don't need to count calories or fat grams to feel that I am healthy and happy.
True

I don't exercise to change my body shape, only to be healthy and happy.
False

I never smoke or use drugs to curb my appetite.
True

I feel comfortable eating around other people -- male and female.
True

I don't harm my body when dealing with stress.
True

I don't compare the way I look to the way my friends look.
False

I don't think I am much bigger or smaller than my friends tell me I am.
False

I am comfortable being naked when alone.
True

I am comfortable being naked with my partner--even with the lights on.
True

I do not feel that I need a sexual partner in order to feel attractive.
True

8 True // 5 False

The more questions you answered True, the more likely you are to have a positive perception of your body.  Keep retaking this quiz over time to gauge your changing body image.

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If you choose to go on this journey with me, answer the questions as truthfully as you can.  We have to learn from our past experiences to learn and grow.  Feel free to do this on your blog, personally, or in the comments below.  You can find your BMI info online with a quick Google search.

Dr. Ian also suggests that you keep a 10 day journal of exactly what you eat and what time, as well as, recording your emotions throughout the day.  I've already done this:

In Summary, I eat at random hours of the day, sometimes with huge gaps in between to the point where I'm starving like Marvin (kinda like right now, my tummy is rumbling).  I don't do it on purpose, I just tend to get caught up in my work.  So it's clear that I need to pay more attention to the times that I'm eating.  In terms of "what" I'm eating, I've made a conscious decision to buy healthier items at the grocery and market, but I have yet to kick the fast food addiction.  And addiction it is.  While I'm working, I feel great.  I feel productive.  During the lull, I feel like a lazy, fat beach whale.  The mission seems impossible, but deep down I know it's not.  It's just going to take a shit load of hard work and effort.

♥,
[MMS]

5 comments:

  1. Will definitely be following you on this. I'm on my own journey but I have a history of loss/gain which usually happen when i stop exercising. I went to London in 2009 and gained 40lbs (arrrrrrg) from lack of exercise coupled with PCOS. I currently work out 4-5x a week and try to eat as healthily as I can. I see the changes. Not as swiftly as I want them to be but I'm definitely in a different place now than I was a year ago

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  2. this is so inspiring I've been trying for months to get my "diet" on stream and i keep getting caught up with work and school.
    I have been making slight changes though where possible and now i really wanna delve into exercising more and eating healthier.
    I wish u all the best

    @Jinz i share ur sentiment with PCOS, I've gained 15lbs since March which was just 2 months ago

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  3. yep, i've been fluctuating and since i wrote this article.. i gained 5 lbs!!!! so easy so gain, so hard to loose..

    what's pcos yall?

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  4. PCOS is poly cystic ovary syndrome it makes managin ur weight and overall health a tad more difficult. more info here http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0001408/

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  5. Yup...PCOS is a beeyatch lol. It has to do with hormonal imbalance and from my experience makes me feel tired all the time etc. And it makes you literally gain weight overnight. Since being diagnosed with it I've gained a ton of weight that I can only get off if I do extreme dieting and exercise...and once you stop it comes back...

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